Nothing like a week of sunshine to cure the blues!

Well, maybe not cure, but definitely improve!  We just got back from our trip to Scottsdale, AZ for my cousin's wedding.  The trip was perfect, couldn't have been better {well, maybe, but only if it had been longer}.  We got in Thursday morning and left late yesterday afternoon.  It's sad to think that 24 hours ago I was still laying by the pool with a drink in my hand {don't judge... it was 5 o'clock somewhere}.  Seriously though, some R&R and family time was just what I needed.  Our resort {The Scottsdale Resort and Conference Center} was awesome... the place itself is gorgeous and the staff are all so friendly and helpful.  We would go back there in a heartbeat.  Rob and I ate at a few really amazing restaurants...   2 from Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives, and one that was the fanciest place I have ever eaten {or maybe a tie with M in Columbus and the Eiffel Tower restaurant in Vegas}... when we walked to our table, they had matchbooks with our name embossed on them waiting at our place settings... I mean COME ON!  We also did some shopping in old town {got a fun southwestern feeling bead for my Pandora} and treated ourselves to a 90 minute couples hot stone massage {HEAVEN}.  All in all it was a great trip.  The wedding went flawlessly, even the happy couple agreed.  The ceremony itself was lovely {our uncle is a Priest so he performed the ceremony - so personal} and cocktail hour was fun, but the reception was to. die. for.  When we walked into the ballroom it LITERALLY took my breath away.  It was that moment from a movie... we walked in and I gasped... and Immediately told Rob, "This is what I want our reception to look like.".  The ballroom itself was massive with gorgeous chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, but the best part was that they draped soft fabric {maybe a tulle or something} over the doorways and made an aisle out of it... seriously, it was incredible.  The food was great and everyone seemed to have a great time.

*****

The day after the wedding there was a lovely brunch at the bride's parents' house.  I got to talk to a lot of my family that I don't usually get to talk to and even set up a lunch with my aunt and uncle and another uncle for later that day.  {Side-note:  because of some family drama that happened 8 years ago I rarely talk to them, but we're working on that.}  After our lunch {which was really more of a dinner} my aunt and Rob and I sat at a table at our resort and talked some things out - which was really great.  I used to be very close to this aunt and uncle and it's been hard to lose that relationship... I think I may slowly get it back though.  After our chat that aunt and uncle had to head for the airport and we followed my other uncle to his room to get their left over wine and beer {whoop whoop!}.  He walked us back to his room and we said our goodbyes.  He shook Rob's hand and then we stood awkwardly for a moment until I asked if I could hug him... he said yes and we hugged for the first time in 8 years.  Needless to say after he left the room I lost it and sobbed on Rob's shoulder for a minute.  It was the first time since the drama all started that I felt like maybe things could get better.  I think it's a far way off and I don't know if "normal" is even possible, but I am going to do everything I can to personally repair my relationship with them.  

*****

I read this in a magazine on the plane: "If you are depressed you are living in the past, if you are anxious you are living in the future, and if you are at peace you are living in the present."  I think that's somewhat accurate... I'm going to do my best to live in the present as much as possible.  With Rob, that is easier to do than it ever has been.  He makes every moment feel special and I am so incredibly in love with him.  I also read this: "Women who vacation more than once a year report lower rates of depression and greater relationship satisfaction." - you know what that means... let's get the countdown to the beach started... 50 days!!!

*Believe Always*

Feeling a little blue...

Today is a bad day... we all have them, those days when the alarm goes off and you continue to push snooze until the last possible minute, and then you still don't want to get out of bed.  I. just. feel. SAD.  {and I hate it}.  So, of course I do the first thing I think of... I make a list.  Why am I sad?  Why don't I have any energy?  Why am I not motivated?  Here's what I came up with:

• Our house is a disaster and its exhausting.  
• I am at the heaviest weight I have ever been and I do not like myself right now.  
• We leave for AZ in two weeks and I feel stressed about how much I want to get done before then.  
• I wanted to get the kitchen organized and it's still a disaster.
• I'm stressed about work, I feel like I have so many loose ends to tie up and no time to do that.
• I'm stressed about mine and Rob's relationship {there, I said it}.

What I want to do is lay in bed and cry all day {and maybe eat a big ice cream sundae}.  But here's what I'm going to do... Take the list one thing at a time and attack it... looking back, I can take control of all of these things in one way or another... the last point is a little fuzzy, but we'll get to that.

• Our house is a disaster and it's exhausting - so I'm going to start cleaning.
• I'm at the heaviest weight I've ever been - so I'm going to do C25K and day one of the 300 ab workout today.
• We leave for AZ in two weeks and I feel stressed about how much I want to get done before then - cleaning will help this.  I'm also going to start a list of things I want to pack.
• I wanted to get the kitchen organized and it's still a disaster - again, cleaning first.  The major organization will have to wait until after vacation, but that's okay.
• I'm stressed about work - I'm going to go in early and work late until everything is caught up and then keep things caught up.
• I'm stressed about mine and Rob's relationship - this will have to be a different post... I know we're fine... I just over analyze everything.

First things first, figure out what I want to accomplish today since I'm not going to work.

Here's my progress today... I took before pictures, but I am really embarrassed to post them... just know it was A LOT of work.

Family Room: Done

I will continue this post and my progress soon!!!